That Was Easy

Categories: Student Life

Aside from opening your school mailbox without looking like a total nerd, unlocking a door without revealing your key-card is perhaps the most essential MiddColl skill. Show up on your first day of orientation with these tricks in-pocket and wow that cute accepted student you met on Facebook in April.

1. The Bag

Difficulty:  ▲

This is lame and will impress no one. Leave key-card in bag → rub bag on sensor → make sure no one was watching → enter dorm

2. The Shoe

Difficulty:  ▲▲

A clever trick when going for a run, or to demonstrate your superb groin flexibility. Conceal key-card in shoe → approach sensor → kick (furiously) → enter dorm

3. The Back Bump

Difficulty:  ▲▲▲

A strategic technique for when sensors are positioned higher than waist level or when your wallet is in your back pocket where it should be. Approach sensor in reverse → jump → rub butt on sensor → check to make sure everyone was watching → enter dorm

4. The Front Bump

Difficulty:  ▲▲▲▲▲

This is hilarious and best suited for you front pocket wallet types. I am not going to tell you how to do it.

5. The Wallet Toss

Difficulty: ▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲▲

This will never, never work and will consistently be slower than any alternative method. This is always the best possible option. Throw wallet at sensor → act nonchalant → see techniques 1–4

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