p. 359

Pfeifer, now known as Nēmec, is paralysed and talking to S. about his lifestyle and emphasises the difference between his and S.’s. Related to the existentialism theme i  the novel, part of their conversation emphasises the freedom of choice:

“‘You could hace stopped running,’ the governor says.

‘I’ve never had the choice.’

The governor laughs, a hiccup of sounds that his frozen body chokes off at his throat. ‘You’ve always had a choice.'”

S. has lived a life devoted to an external force he believed he was bound to. What Pfeifer tries to make him notice, in mockery, is that he always had the freedom of choice, and that he is to blame for the way his life turned out to be.

On the margins, Jen and Eric speculate on their second round of notes:

The new S taking out the (old) S one by one?

But not always by killing them – they turned a lot of them, too. Bouchard + MacInnes had a lot of money.

In contrast, in a later round of notes, things are more intense:

Campus cops all over Standefer today. + in Moody’s office.

FUCK. A thousand times over: FUCK.

No idea how he knew. I swear I didn’t take or break or move anything.

Hope you’re right.

really don’t want to get caught. I know I was out of my head. I’m not that kind of person. I’m really not. But everything’s so crazy right now.